The Great Name Debate

What to name the name has quickly become the topic of conversation around here. After naming three kids, we have developed certain guidelines. But we seem to have different opinions about how to apply the guidelines - and therein lies the dilemma. But at least we've kept the conversation interesting. And it's kind of fun to still have "picking the name" to look forward to - we had names picked out for the other three well before the big sonogram!

Here are the rules we're sticking with...

• the name must be gender specific (no little girls named James or little boys named Leslie - no offense)
• names for boys must be either short or have a short nickname
• names must have a meaning that rings true for us
• every baby is named for someone. This is tricky because I don't mean that we necessarily have to pass on an exact name. Brenna, for example is named after my mother, Brenda and both she and Jack have last names for middle names so they're actually named after lots of people:)

So far we aren't finding the name in any baby naming books! We're just praying that God sends us a name for this little guy - and that He sends it to both of us!

Creating a Birth Plan for a C-section

I really meant to do this before Jack was born, but I didn't have as much time as I thought since he made an early appearance. I did have a few things in mind that I wanted to do differently. Unfortunetly, there were a few complications (unending nausea for me and some breathing issues for him) that threw a wrench into my plans.
This time around I'm trying to think things through and develop a plan. AND put it in writing. I may need Casey or my mom (or my Grandma like last time!) to go to bat for me if I'm a little out of it, so having it written down seems like a smart plan. The first time around I had such specific ideas, but nothing went according to plan. I wound up feeling very out of control and disappointed (when I should've been feeling extremely grateful!). I'm a lot more flexible these days! A ceserean birth is pretty complicated so if things come up I'll just have to roll with it. But, there's no harm in planning, right?
One big thing is the kind of anesthesia I want. So far I've had three c-sections with three different types of anesthesia - general with Levi because it was an emergency, an epidural with Brenna that took three tries and was extremely painful to get, and a spinal block with Jack that was easy to get and worked like a charm. The epidural did have one charm - I got to keep it for the first twenty four hours. It was great to be able to get up and walk around with no pain and I didn't even notice any afterpains. However, the tape holding it on to my back left whelps when they pulled it off - very painful for about a week. The spinal just worked better for me. It was easier and faster and less painful.
And then there's the catheter. Forgive me for being indelicate, but this is a big issue for me! I don't want that thing near me until after the spinal I hope it's not a problem because I will be ugly about it!
I want to see the little guy as soon as they pull him out this time. I almost got to see Jack right away, but, just like a boy, he started peeing everywhere as soon as he was born (marking his territory perhaps?) and they had to pull the curtain back up pretty quick. I'd also like to slow down and spend a few minutes with him before he's whisked off to the nursery. It just never seems like long enough.
From the operating room, it's back to recovery for a long boring hour. I really, really want the baby brought to me back here. They allow a visitor or two, but I'd rather have the baby! It would be so nice to have a little quiet time to nurse him before they move me to a room. If there's a good reason why they can't bring him to me in recovery, I think I'll aim for a little quiet time in the room before visitors start pouring in. I love having everyone there - it would break my heart not to have all our family there - but I don't like to put off that first feeding. I might just have to be a little selfish this time and keep the baby all to myself for a little while:)
Well, that's the plan so far. I'm sure I'll be adding to and updating over the next few weeks as I do more reading and thinking.
Next I need to think about what to have waiting at home!

A doctor's appointment, rescheduling, and other super exciting stuff

Today is the big 30 week mark which means I actually only have 8 1/2 weeks left until little Shane (? Nick? Zane? Gabe? maybe we'll just wait until he can tell us what his name is...) makes his appearance. I've said it before but the only good thing about scheduling a c-section is knowing I have an end-by date. I'm getting soooo excited! We're working out all the details of who stays where with who. So far it looks like the plan is for Casey's mom to spend the night here (and hopefully my mom, too!) the night before. Then Mom, Casey and I can head to the hospital nice and early - gotta be there at 6! And Casey's mom and sister can bring the kids just a little later. I'd really prefer that they were at the hospital right when the baby's born, but... this way I'll be all settled in a room. Levi saw me in recovery after Brenna was born (he was 2 1/2) - I felt fine, but was I shaking all over and that scared him a little.
I'm already gathering supplies to take to the hospital. There were lots of things I wanted last time that I didn't have (in my defense Jack was early) so I'm trying to remember what I wanted and get it together early this time. Here's a quick list of what I want to take...

• take out menus for a few places around town (once I could eat the hospital food was...less than appealing...and yet I was starving! Everyone kept offerring to go get me something, but I couldn't think of what to send them after!)
• really nice pampering stuff
• my nursing pillow (the hospital pillows shift around so much, but you do not want a baby laying on your tummy after a c-section!)
• chlorophyll - I'm hoping to avoid another transfusion!
• oatmeal raisin cookies - fiber is good
• presents for the big kids when they come to visit - probably little stuff from the dollar store
• a picture of Casey and the kids to keep me company when they're not with me

I'm adding to this all the time (I haven't even gotten to the extremely neccessary stuff yet!), but if anyone thinks of anything I should add - let me know!

In the meantime, I'm off to get everyone ready. I have a doctor's appointment (otherwise known as an hour of peace and quiet) and the kids have a playdate with their two grannies:) That one hour will take about four hours of getting ready/dropping off/traveling time, but, boy, is it worth it!

edited to add (for my own benefit!)

• chapstick!

My girl turned three!

While we were outside taking her birthday picture I lined everyone up on the swing so I'd have a recent picture of all of them to take with me to the hospital. Brenna kept thinking of things to "speak in Daddy's ear" and I don't think Levi and Jack were too interested in pictures:) It was pretty hot and they were excited about getting to church. We were on our way to the big end of VBS celebration and y'all I have to brag for a minute. I expected Levi to get up front with the rest of the kids and sing and do the motions and enjoy himself, and he did great! But I never in a million years expected Brenna to get up in front of the whole church, but she got up there and sang and danced her little heart out! Our little princess is starting to come out of her shell:)

My brain is feeling a little more energetic...

now if only my body would follow suit. Nothing appears to be especially wrong with me, except that I'm slightly anemic, and I'm, you know, pregnant. But I'm trying to take full advantage of my new mental clarity by at least figuring out what I would like to get done before Baby gets here. Hubby's time off is very limited these days so I need to be organized about the things I need his help with and our pastor's precious daughter is going to keep the kiddies for me a couple of times this summer so I'll need to know what to do with all that freetime!
One big important thing is getting the kids' rooms switched around. Right now Levi has his own room with a double bed which is also the guest room if we have company. Brenna and Jack share a room with a toddler bed and a crib. We're changing things around a bit though so that Brenna will have the double bed in her room and the baby will (eventually) have the crib in there with her. Levi and Jack will have bunk beds in Levi's room. Lifting a toddler in and out of a crib is a big no-no after you have a c-section so I really want to have all of this done before hand!
I'm also really trying to cook some double batches for the freezer. Last time I got so sick of chicken fingers and pizza! Friends from church do usually bring dinners and my mom will be here for about a week, but Casey does not cook. I'm not sure when he forgot how, when we were dating he cooked all the time. Of course when we were dating I shaved my legs everyday so.... I don't really complain:)
I'm going to be organizing and stocking the laundry room too. It's downstairs (stairs are another no-no when you have a c-section) so I'll be taking full advantage when anyone volunteers to help out with Mt Washmore. Casey is actually great with getting the laundry done. He doesn't finesse it like I do, though, so I'll be keeping Shout upstairs to treat stains when they happen. Also, I need to get the kids clothes all in order. I usually keep play clothes and jammies in a drawer and more presentable clothes hanging in the closet. I had not mentioned that arrangement to Casey last time and he brought the kids to the hospital in play clothes and pajama shirts. I know that's hardly worth mentioning, especially in light of the fact that he did an incredibly fantastic job with them. They were clean, well fed, and had so much fun that I don't think they missed me at all. And the house was spotless when I got home! But it won't hurt anything to lay out a few outfits ahead of time:)
That's the first few things I've thought of. I'm sure I'll come up with lots more over the next twelve weeks. If you have a fabulous tip that helped you survive in the hospital or during those first few weeks at home, I'd love to hear them!

So.Very.Tired.

Today started out pretty well with a trip to the library for storytime. Actually having the strength to voluntarily take all three kids anywhere by myself is kind of a rarity these days, but today I felt pretty good. Now, however, is a different story. I can not believe how this pregnancy is wiping me out. The nausea has begun to let up but the total exhaustion seems to get worse and worse. My iron is (surprisingly) fine and my thyroid medication is working so tomorrow I'll be back at the doctor's to try to figure out what's going on and what I can do about it. In the meantime, here's hoping I can make it through the teeball game this afternoon!

So much going on...

It's been busy around here for the last week or two. Just keeping up with the extremely mobile Jack has kept me on the go. My mom and sister got to come for a quick visit. My sister graduated from high school in Texas last week and I wasn't able to go (doctor's orders). I just can't tell y'all how it killed me to miss it. I am so unbelievably proud of her! But she is so sweet that she flew, on the morning after graduation no less, here to celebrate with us since we couldn't come to her. Our cousin Derek graduated the very next night so we threw them a little party that weekend. If ever two high school graduates deserved to be celebrated - they sure did.
My brother wasn't able to be there since he was deployed in the middle of May. I know he is firmly in God's hands and I'm so proud of what he's doing and just of who he is. But y'all, it's all I can do not to worry myself sick. Part of it is my hormones - pregnancy seems to activate the worst-case-scenario part of my brain. So for now I've pretty much banned myself from watching the news or reading it or joining in the "did you hear what happened" conversations. I hope I'm not the only wimpy one who does that.
I'm at week 25 already! And since I've got a c-section scheduled for the 6th of September (my bestest girlfriend's birthday!) that means I really only have about 13 weeks to go. I can not wait to meet this little guy and, honestly, this pregnancy is wiping me out. I am feeling a little better since I started taking chlorophyll and got some Rainbow Light vitamins, but I'm still extremely fatigued. The nausea does seem to be getting better though so that is a big something to be thankful for!
Only thirteen weeks left...might be time to get started on that "things to do before the baby gets here" list:) We have been doing some of our kindergarten homeschooling stuff already so I won't feel bad about taking it real easy through the fall. I'm actually feeling pretty laidback about all that for right now - I hope I don't get all stressed out about it when the other little five year olds start talking about "real school."
There's been so much more going on - Casey is teaching a new Sunday School class, I have lots of doctor's appointments coming up, there's still more teeball, and we have bedrooms to switch around. Plus there's always dinner to make...

Jack is FINALLY walking!

At 16 months we were starting to get a little worried. He could cruise as long as he was holding on to something, but he just wasn't ready to turn lose. What a great Mother's Day present, though! Maybe he was saving up....

A little update

I'm still sick. But I serve a good, good God. SO much of what I was overwhelmed with last week God has worked out and given me peace over. Last week I just could not imagine how I was going to start getting things back on track around here and one by one my good Father started sorting them out. We've worked on discipline in a calm, consistent way. which just didn't seem possible a week ago, and seen some good results. God provided Casey and I with some time for a date night this weekend and that was so refreshing for both of us. We both work really hard in our own spheres and time together seems to be the first thing we let slide when it gets really busy around here. But it is so important! Without it we each feel like we're in this on our own, but when we have even just a little time together to check-in we get back on the same team and everything is just so much better. I also got a special treat on Saturday night. Casey took me to the Christian bookstore here in town to browse (something I never have time for with the kids) and they've added a whole homeschooling room! With a table and chairs and coffee! And monthly homeschooling meetings with local (and not so local) experts! And the lovely woman running the whole thing - she has 25 years of homeschooling experience! It was such an unexpected blessing. All of Levi's buddies will start Kindergarten this year and I've been a little (okay, a lot) worried that he would feel left out. My prayer was that I would find some way to get him really excited about homeschooling. Well, God's gotten me really excited! More excited than I've been in quite some while. And that's really rubbing off on Levi. God's just gently reminded me of the vision He's given us for our family. I can see the big picture again:) There have just been so many encouragements along the way this week, some big and some small. There were so many prayers answered in totally unexpected ways. As a matter of fact, there's been at least some improvement on every item I put on my list and none of it resulted from what I thought needed to happen. I'm in awe!

Getting things in Order

This has been a rough season. All the systems that we had in place just don't work when mommy is sick and spending LOTS of time on the couch. Add to that the general malaise I've been experiencing (I'm not depressed, just hormonal and very...blah) and one very hard-working hubby. Stir in three kids going through all sorts of different growth spurts and developmental stages. Sprinkle liberally with church "issues." Broil under the constant critique of family, friends, aqauintences and little old ladies in Kroger. What you wind up with is one big mess.
Now, I don't mean that everything is going wrong. Far from it. We are all thrilled about this new little baby. To say that we can't wait for September would be quite the understatement. And we all still love each other and like to hang out together. We still have a wonderful bedtime ritual that includes devotions and prayers and wrestling with Daddy (or Brenna's new favorite game, combing fleas - please don't ask). Levi's learning to read at a rate that just astounds me and Brenna is (finally) getting the hang of going to the potty. Jack has become a real charmer and we're still at church every Sunday morning.
But the things that are going wrong...well, they need a lot of work. There's just so much that I know I need to do, and so much that I don't have a clue what to do about, and even some that I need to stop worrying about all together and just let God handle. So, my big plan is (drumroll for those who know me) to make a list. Because that's what I do. Then I'm going to spend some serious time praying over this list. First thing on the list? Asking God for the time to spend serious time praying over the list! I've spent the last few months making feeble attempts at handling all this and all I've figured out is that I really can't. Not on my own. Not without Him.
Here's just a little of what's on the list. If any of you feel led to share what's worked for you - I couldn't be any more open to suggestion:)
Challenge #1. Finding daily time with God.
Challenge #2. Disciplining myself to get my work done even when I don't feel like it. And cutting back/delegating *my* work so that is even possible.
Challenge #3. Getting some new simplified routines in place so that things still function with a very pregnant mommy and with a new baby.
Challenge #4. Getting the house simplified for the same reason.
Challenge #5. Knocking out some discipline problems in the kids (disrespectful attitudes, laziness, whining, etc!)
I can't wait to get started on even a little of this!

Week 21

I finally hit week 21 today! That actually only leaves me a little over 17 weeks since we've officially scheduled a c-section for September 6 (my best friend's birthday! Hey, Betty!). Of course, this little fella is going to get here when he gets here. We had a schedule for Jack, too, but he made an early appearance. I'm hoping that doesn't happen this time, but I will be prepared ahead of time this fall instead of waiting until the last minute (you know, so I won't run out of stuff to do and get bored).
All that stuff in the pregnancy books about how morning sickness should be gone by week 12 or 14 or whatever...well, that doesn't apply to me. I'm still sick and probably will be for quite some time. The plus side is...honestly, I don't know what the plus side. There probably is one, but thinking about it makes me very cranky so let's move on.
Seeing the little guy on the sonogram last week has made me almost unbearably excited to get my hands on him! Y'all should've seen how cute! But since I was so sure we were having a girl (so much for my intuition this time around!), we hadn't given much thought at all to a boy name. We (I) had Mary Suzanna picked out for a girl, btw - Mary for my grandmother and Suzanna for my sister. I'm a little disappointed that I won't get to use that name this time around, but I don't think it's fair to name a little boy Mary so we'll have to think of something else:) We have a tradition of naming our kid's after someone in our family, but since we've used several last names for middle names we're running out of men who need a namesake. I'm also trying to give each one their own initial so names beginning with L, B or J are out unless we fall in love with a name and just have to change the rule. And we want a strong, masculine sounding name. It's become quite a trend around here to give little girls decidedly boy names (I know a James, a Micheal and a Emma Brock - all girls) and so many names have become quite either/or. The really "boy only" name list is shrinking fast so all ideas are welcome!
I guess we still have a little while to figure it out:)

For moms of boys

Barbara Curtis had a great post not long ago on Raising Boys. Since she's raised several of them, I thought she might be a good person to ask for book recommendations. I've been looking for books we could read aloud to Levi that would encourage the character traits we're trying to instill in him - things like bravery, chivalry, morality. These things seem to be somewhat out of fashion with children's authors these days. But Barbara did me one better and went straight to a real live boy (well, he used to be a boy!), her son Zach. His list of recommendations is really good and there are lots more in the comments section, so be sure to check that out too.

Raising boys is especially on my mind lately since we just discovered we'll soon have three to raise! I'm in awe of the trust God's placed in us, but also so humbled at just how impossible it would be without Him.

My BRAIN is lost!

After looking for three days, I finally thought to ask Casey if he had seen my steno book which I affectionately refer to as "my brain." I have a Homemaking Binder that stay at home, but my little steno book houses my (ever-growing) Master List - everything I need to remember to do. It's also where I keep shopping lists, books to check out of the library, notes form the books I'm reading....you get the idea. Casey asked when I had it last - at Walmart on Saturday - then he got that AHA! look followed immediately by the UH-OH! look. "I laid it on top of the car when we were buckling car seats. I must have left it up there." So my brain is somewhere between Walmart and home. Having done a lot (and I mean A LOT) of things like this in my life, I didn't give him a hard time. It won't be long before I lose or mess up something of his so hopefully I bought myself some brownie points:) I'm pretty sure I can recreate what I lost, but I am concerned about what kind of info might have been in that notebook. There weren't any last names or addresses or account numbers, but much of what I had written down was not intended for public consumption. There were several pages of notes on a book written for postpartum women, for example. Imagine the notes on leakage, engorgement and getting back into the *swing* of things. Someone out there (oh, Dear Lord, let it be someone I don't know!) is getting a good laugh.

What a rough week

I'm finally at the halfway mark! This pregnancy has certainly had some ups and downs so far. I had a reprieve from the usual non-stop nausea for the first two months, but it's been steadily getting worse - last week was the worst yet! But I am finally keeping most fluids down (as long as it's not tea) and some food so that's really helping. The Braxton Hicks contractions, which started at week 15, have been quite painful and frequent. I wound up at the doctor's office yesterday just to make sure they were, in fact, Braxton Hick contractions and nothing else. I was so thankful for a perscription that I can take at home to stop them. I was really worried that a hospital stay would be in my immediate future. But, good news, the baby is just fine and dandy in there:) I have a sonogram scheduled for Friday and we're really hoping to be able to tell if we're expecting a girl or a boy. I will be thrilled either way, but I can't wait to know!

Also this week, my brother got some worrisome news. It's not something I'm able to talk about, but I would really appreciate your prayers for him. And for me - I'm having a very hard time not worrying about him.

We're having some issues at church, too. I'm not even sure how to explain it. I love this church and the people are very much family for us. But there seems to be a cloud hanging over us - that loving feeling is gone (almost). Part of me feels like this is similar to a marriage that is going through a rough patch and that we should hang in there and work it out. But part of me wants to call it quits!

All in all not my best week. This one has got to get better right? RIGHT?!

Time for some spring cleaning in the parenting department...

It's time for hubby and I to have to figure out a new plan for Levi. Boy, the oldest child really is kind of a guinea pig, huh? We've been cooped up all week since he and Jack are sick and between him feeling bad and cabin fever, I've had a chance to see a lot of behaviour "issues" that just have to go. I've been out of sorts this pregnancy and not sticking to our usual schedule. Plus there's been a considerable amount of...crankiness, let's call it...going around our house. So I know he's reacting to all that, but I'm at the end of my rope. It's time for a new plan!

Woman, why do you weep?

But Mary stood outside of the tomb, weeping. And as she wept, she stooped down into the tomb.
And she saw two angels in white sitting there, the one at the head and the other at the feet, where the body of Jesus had lain.
And they said to her, Woman, why do you weep? She said to them, Because they have taken away my Lord, and I do not know where they have laid Him.
And when she had said this, she turned backward and saw Jesus standing, but she did not know that it was Jesus.
Jesus said to her, Woman, why do you weep? Whom do you seek? Supposing Him to be the gardener, she said to Him, Sir, if you have carried Him away from here, tell me where you have laid Him and I will take Him away.
Jesus said to her, Mary! She turned herself and said to Him, Rabboni! (which is to say, Master!) (John 20:11-16)


We have had the most wonderful Easter season. The Easter tree, passover communion at church, watching a passion play at a local church...our attention has been so focused on Christ this year and I am so grateful! So grateful that I am not even moping over the fact that the kiddies were to sick to go to church this morning! Even with having to miss church, this Easter has been so incredibly much better than last year!

The passion play we went to Friday night was truly wonderful. I did forget my tissues, though, when in actuality I needed a roll of paper towels! We also watched The Passion of the Christ on Saturday. I try to watch it every year -it's such an incredible reminder of all He suffered for me. But this year both the play and the movie left me with a slightly unfinished feeling until I realized what was missing - the most important part! The true Easter story is the story of the empty tomb! I don't mean that the road to the cross isn't important, it certainly is! But the heart of the story is that He arose! Can we imagine the grief Mary must have felt at the tomb - her teacher, her Savior, not only dead but tortured and hung on a cross? And now to find His body gone? But then to see for herself that HE AROSE! That He WAS and IS CHRIST the KING, SON of GOD! That's joy we should know well! I hope you're all having an incredible Easter and basking in His love!

What kind of example am I setting here....

Note the baby face down on the kitchen floor! Sheesh!

At my house last week....

The morning sickness continues. I spent a lot of time on the couch as the piles of stuff (laundry, dishes, toys, books, etc) grew taller and taller. I did get a few bursts of energy so I was able to keep things...well, not exactly under control, but good enough so the health department isn't stopping by.
We're really enjoying our Easter tree ornaments, which wound up having to be hung on my artificial ficus since the pollen has been so horrible that I didn't dare bring flowering branches inside like I originally planned. I love the way it makes us stop to focus on HIM. We've never really celebrated the Easter season before - it's always just been a long weekend of Easter traditions. I really like spending more time to focus on it.
We had a surprise birthday party for my Granny this week - she turned 70! It was a huge success because a) everyone had a ball and b) my kids behaved. Brenna did have a few rough minutes at the beginning - she has some shyness issues that we're working on - but she was cheerful and friendly for the rest of the evening. Also, someone brought the best potato salad I have ever tasted. I was so glad to be able to eat!
Teeball season is off to quite a start. Levi is on a team with five and six year olds so he's one of the youngest and he's having a great time. Me, not so much. The coach is pretty strict about his schedule and the rules (practice three times a week, ya'll! And two of those practices are two hours each!) which I am trying to appreciate. I actually want Levi to have some structure and get used to an authority besides mom and dad. That being said...I'm having a hard time biting my tongue about a couple of things - certain kids are getting away with really bad behavior and poor sportsmanship and there is a lot of focus on how *skilled* the kids are (or aren't), which I think is ridiculous for 5 & 6 year olds. The mother bear in me is definitely growling a little:) But Casey is helping out at every practice and game and Levi is really enjoying himself, so... I guess I'll take a wait and see approach for now.
I did a good bit of clothes shopping for the kids at the Kid's Karosel sale. Since we don't have a used clothing store in town anymore (we do have the Salvation Army, but that's it), a woman in town has started a nice business for herself holding two big kid's clothing sales a year. It works great, you drop off anything you want to sell, set your own prices and get 70% of what it sells for. The last day of the sale is half price on (almost) everything. And there is a big pre-sale for all the consignors. This year I went to the pre-sale and made out like a bandit. I had always waited for the half-priced day, but at the pre-sale I realized that all of the best priced stuff goes first so I actually did better shopping then. Of course I still went back on the last day - who can resist half off? Levi has tons of clothes from all his older cousins and Jack has all of Levi's hand-me-downs, but not all of them are the right size for the season. So I filled in Jack's spring and summer wardrobe and essentially bought all of Brenna's. Levi did get a few brand new polo style shirts for church for $1 each! Brenna got lots of dresses, one with hand smocking across the front. All in all I spent less than $40 for all three kids and I made $48 on the stuff I sold:)
Now, to jump into this week. Only I don't feel like jumping. Maybe I'll ease a toe into this week and see how it goes:)

I sure don't post much, do I?

I have lots of very good excuses like nausea, exhaustion, lots of busy littles...things like that:) But I'm definitely not ready to give up blogging. It's just too wonderful to have somewhere to share my (oh so brilliant!) thoughts. You know, when I'm alert enough to think anything beyond what I can feed the kids that won't make me throw up. Lovely, huh?

Speaking of nauseous...I read an article this morning that literally made me sick. One of the things I enjoy about reading my news instead of listening to it is that I can censor what I read. Ordinarily, I like to be well informed, even about bad news. But when my hormones are out of control, it doesn't take much at all to get me upset... a missing child can keep me up nights for a week. But this morning I read this article anyway. I'm so angry that I'm going to have trouble putting words together. At least twenty-three babies have died so far THIS YEAR in Germany and the only solution anyone is putting forth is to create more "drop off" locations so that mothers can legally abandon their babies. If a woman values her baby so little that she's willing to throw it out a ten story window do policy makers really think she's going to go through the trouble of taking it to a hospital and risk being caught? And make no mistake, these women don't value these babies. Why is that? Why are there mothers who think their own babies are mere trash to be thrown out? Because that's what society thinks. Because that's what abortion IS - tiny babies thrown out like trash. If it's all right to abort a baby, why wouldn't it be all right to wait a few months and do it yourself? We're teaching women and men that children are worthless unless they're wanted so why are we surprised when we find women who take this idea to it's natural conclusion. And what happens when a wanted baby is no longer wanted? When that adorable newborn turns into a six month old that won't let you put her down, a toddler that gets into everything, a teenager who talks back and stays out too late? Will we be surprised when mothers kill their older children because they've become too much trouble, because they want to pursue a career without being held back by motherhood, because their new boyfriend doesn't like kids? We like to think that women kill their children because of depression or mental illness, and that is the case sometimes, but society has to take our share of the blame here too. We encourage men and women to put their own desires first, to avoid having babies until they want them and even then not to let children get in the way of doing what we want. Germany's population (and the populations of every industrialized nation) is decreasing rapidly "because we value prosperity more than we value children" (that's a quote from this great sermon by Voddie Baucham). Society doesn't value children, why do we expect that individuals still will?
I'm *just* a stay at home mom without a fancy title or degree. But I can tell you what it's going to take to save these babies, to save Germany, to save every nation that's on the same path (including our own!). We will all have to believe what God says in His Word about children - that they are blessings directly from His hand. We will have to value being a wife and mother. We will have to teach our children (and ourselves) that there is honor in serving others, in laying down our own desires for the good of someone else. No other band aid solutions are going to work as long as continue to want our own way above all else.

Beginning our Easter Celebration

This is what we've been up to this morning - making ornaments for our Easter tree. I first read about an Easter tree in the book No Ordinary Home which is wonderful, btw. We are doing a simplified version this year (this isn't quite all of the ornaments - I was interrupted before I could finish the empty tomb and the marriage supper) and I hope to add in new stories every year until we're eventually doing a story a day all through Lent.
God has really blessed me this year as I've searched for ways to really teach my kids about Him. I've found wonderful ideas everywhere for traditions that really point us towards God - now it's just a matter of taking a few of them and making them personal for us. I'm so so SO excited about Easter this year - I hope y'all are, too!